Open Door Policy...

The door to my dorm room is heavy. It's easier to just keep the door shut. Less noise gets through, I can do whatever I want, and nobody will bother me. It doesn't stay open by itself and not all door stops keep it open. But you miss out on so much when you leave your door shut. You don't meet anybody and there is no air flow so it gets stiflingly hot and you can't use the expensive, new duvet you bought for your bed. The key is to find the right door stop. Once you find a good door stop it's way easier to keep the door open.

Ok, please tell me someone caught on to my bitchin' door metaphor?... anybody?... Bueller? No? Ok, let's get more literal:

Truth be told, college hasn't been an instant hit for me. I didn't instantly find a group of friends nor did I get involved with anything. College is hard. Not just the workload, but the actual concept of college is hard. All of a sudden I was living in this new building full of people I didn't know. I didn't know where to go for lunch or how to print out my Sociology homework. Everything was new and different and that feeling was rather disconcerting. It would be much easier to sit in my room and watch Netflix (which is something I have done often) than to go out into the hall and chat with the people who had their doors open. But when has anything truly good in life ever come easy? I'm paying too much to live at this school to just sit in my room with the door shut; I can do that at home for free. If you're going to feel like crap it might as well be because of something you did instead of something you didn't do. So I made a decision. I decided to do one thing each day that I wasn't 100% sure that I wanted to do. It doesn't matter how small the decision, just as long as it was something. Sometimes it's as small as leaving my (literal) door open for a few hours. One decision was to sign up for sorority recruitment. I spent four days smiling constantly and answering the same four questions over and over again. I was a nervous wreck through the entire process, but I don't regret doing it. I've met more people in the past two weeks than I met in my entire two years at SFCC. The increase in Instagram followers alone is reason enough to join. Another decision was to sign up for some volunteer work on campus. If I'm going to be here I might as well get my money's worth.

 I fully believe that you get back as much as you put in. I was sitting in my room with the door shut waiting for the college experience to come to me, but life doesn't work that way for most people; it certainly never has for me. It has taken some adjustment and I'm sure it won't be all smooth sailing from here but each bump along the way makes me stronger and I'm not alone in this adventure. I'm excited for college. I'm excited to find out who my Big is on Friday and I'm excited to be an AOII. I'm excited for college and I'm excited to be an Eagle.

The Big Three of Life...

Strap in people we're going deep today. I have an answer to the Big Question: What is the meaning of life? This is a three part answer, this is a big question to answer so don't expect a quick answer... There are three things that give significance to our existence. Do these three things and I guarantee you a lifetime of happiness (dramatized for effect). Are you ready? Have I stalled enough? THE BIG THREE: See, Do, Learn. It's that simple. Need I go on? I'll go on.

1. SEE. Just see stuff. I, myself, have seen very little and I am attempting to amend that. You don't even have to go that far; though I recommend you do. Just get in your car or on your bike or whatever it is you use as transportation and go see stuff. Humans are creatures of habit, but I promise you that there is much more out there than the places where you are comfortable. There is only so much you can grow if you never leave the nest.

2. DO. Just do stuff. Having led a rather sedentary life this is a big one for me. Go hike through a forrest or jump out of a plane (wear a parachute), join a club, meet some new people, whatever gets you kneecap deep in human existence and exposed to more than just your own life. We have the internet so we think we know things about other people, but believe me when I tell you that nothing teaches you more about the world than experiencing it firsthand. So get moving and do stuff because there is a lot of stuff to do and not a whole lot of time to do it.

3. LEARN. None of this means anything if you don't learn from it. All the seeing and all the doing won't do you any good if you don't incorporate it into your existing. Every adventure is a lesson in disguise. You will learn from seeing and doing without even actively trying to. I am nearing the end of my time in Alaska and after 15 weeks of 20 different people I can definitely say I've learned a lot. I thought I had things pretty figured out when I left home, but man did the world show me up. There are so many people out there and so many things to learn from each of them. I have met people who very clearly live by the Big Three and others who have never left their safety bubble behind. I've found that the safety bubble people are the ones who's names I forget first. The people who have the biggest impact on the world are the ones who the world has most impacted. The human existence shouldn't just be about existing.

So, as you marinate in my wise words of wisdom think of all the seeing and doing and learning that you've done and also think about what you can still see, do, and learn. It's never too late to have the world prove you wrong about itself. Go forth and see, do, and learn. Live by the Big Three and I promise you will be wiser and happier with your life.

A Quick Update...

It's been over a month since I last posted anything, but I assure you that I have not forgotten or neglected my writing. I have a list of topics and several half-posts, not to mention the fact that I am surrounded by inspiration, but I'm also very picky about what I put out for others to see. Writing is something I've been doing for a very long time; my childhood notebooks are filled with unfinished stories and abandoned characters. Each time I sit down to write something I spend a solid hour moving commas and replacing adjectives. I would love to be able to post something at least once a week, and hopefully I get to that point, but for where I am right now I don't want to force anything. If I force myself to sit down and write something out, if I pencil it into a calendar I won't be writing in the quality that I strive to. So for now I am just posting as topics pop into my head. There is a section on my homepage that allows you to follow my blog by email if you find yourself interesting in my online ramblings.

So, in summary, I'm doing my best, I'm new at this, thank you for all your support and kind words over the last 6 posts, I look forward to writing more and I hope you look forward to reading it!

How did this happen to you Molly?

I get asked this question almost daily because (almost daily) things just seem to happen to me. I trip over air, I drop 90% of the things that I try to hold in my hands and somehow any unstable ground within a mile manages to find it's way under my feet. Now don't ask me how these things always happen to me. I certainly do not plan any of them. I'm just an accident magnet. Take, for example, the events last Saturday night. We had just finished dinner and I was preparing to go kayaking with my fellow crew member Nicky. In my preparation I strongly debated whether or not to bring my cell phone because, being as accident prone as I am, I knew the likelyhood of me dropping it in the ocean was high, but it was a pretty night and I knew I would want to take a picture or two. So, despite my better judgement, I zipped my phone in my pocket and got in the kayak. About five minutes into my kayak ride I realized my jacket, and with it my phone, had been completely submerged in the water for the entire beginning of the trip. Swiftly, we returned to the lodge and I enclosed the waterlogged phone in a bag of rice. At this point I decided to continue the kayak ride anyways. Had I known then what would occur the rest of the night I would've just called it a night and gone to bed. But I didn't know, so we got back in the kayak and rode out to the logs marking entrance to the lodge.  Once on the logs we fished, to no avail, for roughly ten minutes before the log I was standing on decided to secede from its union with the other logs and break off on its own, Confederate stylez. Because of this secession I was dumped into the water. Nicky was in utter hysterics laughing at the situation I'd gotten myself into (To be fair I was laughing just as hard). Finally, I managed to get myself back up onto the log. The universe was clearly trying to send me a fairly obvious message to get my butt back to the lodge. So I listened. My boots; however, did not. Maybe ten feet further down the log my boots betrayed me and I slipped. Into the ocean. Again. In full view of the lodge house deck where about nine guests where being treated to drinks and a show. I received an obscene, albeit deserved, amount of mockery from this incident.

I don't know how I always manage to get myself into these situations, actually wait, I don't think that's a fair statement. I don't know how these situations always manage to find me. Eight other crew members at this lodge, but somehow everything always seems to happen to me.

The first thing I learned in Alaska...

I'm sitting on the front porch of the lodge house, remnants of this morning's pancake toss still floating lazily on the surface of the water, it's peaceful and calm and almost everyone is asleep because we wake up at such an ungodly hour every day. But naps hate me, so I'm awake and staring at the ocean, which is something I find myself doing quite often. Spokane has its views but nothing can beat the ocean. It catches me off guard every time. Seriously, the ocean. If you're curious how I feel about the ocean just find the cheesiest, sappiest love story and just replace the names with Molly and ocean and you've just about got it. I sit at breakfast in the morning and stare out the bay window and see whales jumping in the distance and clouds resting in the mountains in the (further) distance. (man this post started out really literate but it's deteriorated rather quickly hasn't it?)
Anyways, back to the subject at hand. I'm sitting on the front porch, pancakes on water, you remember all this... the ocean is pretty. Pretty ocean = inspiration for blog post. So, after a heart stopping moment of nearly dropping my phone into the water (I heard that sigh mom) I started writing. And then it took me another week to finish writing because I work seven days a week and there isn't a ton of quiet time other than when everyone is asleep like they are right now. ANYWAYS. What I am thinking about as I sit by the ocean is all the people that I've met in my short time here. From the crew to the guests, it's been a constant surprise. So (to connect back to the title) the first thing I've learned in Alaska is this: never judge a book by it's cover. It's the first thing they teach you in school, it's also one of the biggest cliches out there, but cliches are highly underrated. When you step off a boat at a fishing lodge in Alaska and everyone you meet is wearing at least one article of Carhartt clothing you form a pretty specific idea about them, especially when you come into the situation expecting to have a specific opinion of all these people. But (almost) every single one of these people has surprised me. Coming from city life (Laclede, ID is considered city life up here) I was very wary of spending my summer with fishermen and crew members I assumed I would have nothing in common with, but as it turns out you really only need one thing in common as a base and friendship will grow from there. And, for me, that base is Sea Otter Sound Lodge. It's crazy how much you learn about people when you spend twenty four hours a day with them seven days a week. Now I've always considered myself a pretty accepting person, but after getting to know all these people I'm realizing that I do judge people. Everyone does. We group ourselves into categories to try and make sense of the world around us and we stick to our category. Well I can definitely say I've stepped outside my category, and I would encourage every person to step outside of their category as well, because not only will you learn a lot about another category, but also about yourself. And the more people I meet the more I realize that maybe these categories aren't all their made out to be. So far I have met several BP executives, the man who inspired the Deadliest Catch, a South African molecular biologist, a man attempting to cure Leukemia, and more Northern Californians than I can count. These are people who study and wear suits for a living, but they come up to Off The Grid, Alaska and spend five days in a boat wearing suits of plastic and fish guts. So don't judge a book by its cover, because categories are meaningless.

Well there. I seem to have gotten my point across. To sum it up, I'm learning so much about fishing, working hard, and about the world.

Whole New World...

GOOD NEWS PEOPLE... I have Wi-Fi. I now can bless/curse you all with my words whenever I damn well please. Now buckle up because I have a lot to say... or skim it, I won't be offended. Well, I have reached the end of my first full day here at Sea Otter Sound Lodge. It took two cars, three planes, and a boat to get me here, but I got here at like 4:00 PM (which felt like 5:00 because I am an hour behind Spokane here). When I reached Ketchikan, AK I thought I had arrived in the smallest airport in existence. The top floor looked like a small cafeteria and the actual airport was in the basement and only one 737 can fit on the runway at a time. From Ketchikan I was going to be flying to Klawock. We got on this tiny airplane because Klawock is more of a village than an actual town and they have less airport than Ketchikan does. I am not afraid of flying, in fact, I quite enjoy it. But this flight was in a dingy little plane in a mass of clouds and rain. Usually, even that wouldn't bother me, except that the pilot texted the entire flight. That was a new one for me. I don't know what I would have preferred him to look at as the plane was completely enveloped by clouds. I felt like I was ascending into the heavens and momentarily worried that my plane had crashed and I'd died and gone to Heaven (which I wasn't 100% sure I'd even get into in the first place).

Finally, my flight arrived in Kalwock and that was when I realized that I was officially in the smallest airport in existence. It was more like a giant shed with a really long driveway than it was an airport. From there we were picked up in a truck that took us to a boat that took us to the lodge. The boat ride was insane. It was so pretty and there were sea otters and whales all over the place. The whole first night felt kind of unreal, it hadn't quite sunk in yet that I was in Alaska for the next three months. We unpacked, had dinner, and just hung out until bed. At breakfast the next morning we were told we got the next two days off which apparently is a huge thing because everyone's faces broke into these huge grins. Everyone took the opportunity to spend the entire day on the water. After returning to the lodge for our forgotten bait we only came in for meals. I caught a 17 lb. King Salmon and I get to bring all the meat home so salmon bake at my place when I get home. We went back out after dinner and had no luck, but we abandoned our fish search when we saw a whale, because really who cares about a salmon when you can chase a whale through the water. We followed Wilfred (the Whale) for a solid 20 minutes and Matthew, who has been here for over three years, said he had never seen a whale that active before. So basically, we all went home awestruck by Wilfred and windburned from the countless hours spent on the boat. I keep getting asked if Alaska is meeting my expectations, but I honestly had no expectations coming up here because I had no idea what I was about to do. So far, I've seen an eagle swoop down next to my boat, a whale getting his fitness on, and so many jellyfish that I've lost count. It's only day three, but so far so good. 

The Final Frontier...

...no wait. That's Space. The Last Frontier... that's Alaska. Which is where I'm going. Tomorrow actually, and it's going to be different. Everyone keeps asking me if I'm excited. It's like the inescapable "What are you doing next year?" when you graduate from high school. t's a rite of passage, and I thought I'd already made it safely through that rite, yet here I am again. "Are you excited for Alaska?" Generally, I answer noncommittally because I have very little idea what I'm about to get myself into and therefore no idea what I should expect.

Here's what I do know:

1. I'm very excited to see Alaska. Supposedly it's very beautiful up there. I picture it as an even more nature-y Pacific Northwest, sort of like the Olympic Peninsula.  
2. I want to see the stars. We get pretty good night skies here in the Spokane area, but up in Alaska the sky will be even cooler as there will be little to no light pollution. (And yes, it does get dark where I am. The sun does rise at 4:15 every morning though).
3. It's definitely going to be an experience. This is something that is vastly different from anything I've ever done before. I've spent many a summer at Camp Reed, but only for a week or two at a time. 
4. I think it's going to be cool to live on the ocean. Literally, I'm living on a floating dock in the ocean. It's going to be weird, but hey, at least we know I'm safe from bear attacks.
5. If I don't see at least one whale up close I will be filing a formal complain with the state of Alaska expressing my utter disappointment in their lack of whales.

So, in conclusion, I have no idea if I'm excited, but I'm sure I'll know soon and I'll be sure to let you all know when/if I have any access to the internet. This is roughing it people.... limited phone, internet, tv, and Instagram for 3 whole months. My inner white girl is curled up in the fetal position weeping. But I'll adjust. Though, I may not be sure how excited I am, I do welcome the change (mostly) and look forward to the many adventures I'm sure to have. And no mom, I'm not depressed so stop worrying.